blog #2

I don't remember what happened last night, but I woke up in a bouncy house at a Carnival. "Ughhh, I feel like shit." I jumped out the bouncy house and saw Sugar. "Who the fuck named you sugar." I said jokingly because her shirt had sugar painted on it. "You dont have to be an asshole because my name is sugar." I gave her an akward look. "Your name is actually Sugar?" "Yes it is." I laughed a lilttle bit and said, "Who the fuck named you sugar?" "My mo.." I got bored and walked away. I heard some music comming from behind the bouncy house and decided to take a look. "Haahahah thats hilarious." I saw a organ-grinder with a monkey pick-pocketing people when they're not looking. "Idiots, but I have an idea." I waited untill the monkey got tired and layed down. "The shoes on the other foot now you little primate." Yup, I pick-pocketed the little thief. "hummmmm, about $100. what to do now."

blog#4

Trying to get as much sleep as possible, I turn in my bed facing the window for a more comfortable spot. The sun is beaming through my window hitting me directly in my eyes. "Ughhhh...why are you shining so bright today sun?" I ask as if the sun could reply back. I go to close the curtains when I notice a limo parked in front of Queens Palace. "I wonder who that could be." Talking to myself of course, but out of my closet I hear, "It's Lil Wayne." "WHAT THE FUCK!! WHO'S IN MY APARTMENT?!?" The closet door starts to open slowly as if I was the main character in some scary movie. Jose Guapo steps out laughing. "I've been in your closet for about 3 days." I give him a death stare and grab my BB-gun. "You got 3 seconds." Cocking my BB-gun I aim between his eyes. "...2" He starts to run, but I dont let him get far before I shot him. *POP* *POP* *POP* *POP* *POP* *POP* Hahahahaha I unloaded the whole clip on the back of his head. *Ring Ring Ring* "Hello? Oh whats up," My good friend Rio Sharpe asks me if I want to go bowling, "why the hell would I go bowling. I'd rather shower in a pool of rat and pig guts then dry off with Micheal Jackson's ashes." I hang up, grab my bag, and walk out my apartment building. "I wonder whos limo that is?" I walk towards it to get a better look when the limo driver jump out the sun roof. "Hey you little pest, you touch the limo you lose your hand." I dont even know this man and he's being negative. "Man fuck your limo bruh. This shit not even that clean." "Iight little man, I got something for your smart ass." The driver gets out and walk into Queens Palace. "Bitch, I got something for your piece of shit limo." I open my bag and pull out my switch blade. *shank shank shank* "I love the sound of air rushing out of popped tires." I pull out my spray paint and tag 'Flimsy Crone' on the side in white. "Hahahaha lets see you explain that whippin boy." climb on top of Queens Palace and get my BB-gun ready. "WHAT THE FUCK!?! THIS ISN'T EVEN MY LIMO!!!! ARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!! IM GOING KILL THAT KID!!!" You can see the steam comming out his ears. I aim at his head and give him 3 good shots on his forehead. "OWW!! WHO THE FUCK JUST SHOT ME!?!" I laugh to myself and get off the building from the back. "Dumbass." I go back to my apartment building and lay on my bed. "What a day." I say as I turn on my t.v. Flipping through channels I turn on the local news. "The Bowling alley has been robbed. The police have no suspects at this time but we'll check back to keep the viewers posted." "Haahahaha bowling is for flimsy crones anyway." "In other news, a celebrities limo has been stripped from its dignity. Tires popped and graffiti tagged across the side. The only clue police has found is the taggers name 'Flimsy Crone'."I look out the window and see yellow tape surrounding Queens Palace and the Limo. "Hahahah that was quick." I close my curtains and go to bed early. Work waits for noone.

blog #1- Fu-cking Chicken

Brockman woke up to car alarm at 6am. Tired from all night partying and work the next day he forced himself up. “God I hate Mondays.” he says as he walks towards the bathroom. 10 minutes later he’s outside waiting for his bus to take him to work. Fu-king Chicken.